Tag Archives: dating

Perplexed

My narc-spotting glasses are obviously dirty, I can’t figure out the deal with this guy and that worries me! Am I losing my touch? Help me out.

His self description isn’t too bad: “Tell you about me …hmmmm This part of the site sucks but here is something small to start you off lol. I work in the music industry and i love my job. Music is the biggest part of my life with my career and my personal life. I like to learning new things about people. I have a very open mind with many things in life and i try to never stress over the little things. I own my own house and very ambitious and looking for my partner to have goals and not afraid to take chances to achieve them :)”

Aside from the fact that he’s in the music industry which has a terrible reputation for infidelity, I don’t get any big red flags there. But then he sends two messages and signs with a different name each time:

sidevans

What’s that all about?? That just seems careless and stupid to me. I guess maybe Sid is his profile name and Gregg is his real name..? Any thoughts out there, my experienced friends? I haven’t seen this tactic before.

Advertisements

Narc Spotting: Got One!

I know this isn’t healthy, but I decided to create a couple of fake accounts, poke around and see what narc is up to online these days. Strangely, I can’t find him anywhere in OK Cupid or POF. (I haven’t looked in years, I had just assumed he’d still be there.) It makes me wonder if he’s burned too many people in those sites and moved elsewhere, or if he’s hidden his profile.

Nevertheless, I came across this gem in the process. One man, two profiles:

narc

Shall we take a peek at what he has to offer?

Itsfuntobealive Smoothfriction
Self-summary: Easy going tall dark hair blue eyes. I Balance intellectual pursuits with humor and silly fun.take things seriously when I have to with 100% focus but when it is play time I also excel. I like to be the joker life of the party. Looking for a long term committed relationship but til I find the one I can enjoy some no strings playful fun. I’m tall, blue eyes, dark hair, easy going but no Pushover. Multi talented, Learner, collage student, electrical apprentice former electronic technician. Too much to write..LOL ask and you will receive. 🙂
I’m really good at: Fixing things (almost anything) , humour , finding deals and interesting things, last but not least listening to a woman’s needs and making her feel fully woman. If Ynwim. 😉 Lots of things
The first things people usually notice about me: Piercing marble blue eyes, smile with a serious probing gaze to figure out exactly who you are friend or foe? Unanswered
 Unanswered Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food – Books: 1984 , corporate fascism, confessions of an economic hit man, American Conspiracies by Jesse Ventura ( navy seal, governor), the creature from Jekyll island (creation of the federal reserve). Movies: I robot, terminator, Enron, much more
I spend a lot of time thinking about: A.d.i.d.a.s. lol. Really World politics, the environment, corporate and government corruption, information in general cause knowledge is power. Cliche but true. Unanswered
The six things I could never do without: Woman, electricity, water, food, cellphone, toiletpaper Oxygen, Food, Water, Comfort, Sex, Friends
You should message me if: Your real Like what you see. Your an honest fun person
I’m looking for:For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex
Education: University Not selected (though note he does say above that he’s a “collage” student)
Last online: February 1 Today – 2:10am

But wait, that’s not all! I’d never been on OK Cupid before. I noticed this handy “Personality” tab was filled out for his Itsfuntobealive profile. Check this out:

narc1

OK friends, it’s time for some target practice. Who wants to call out all the narcy (and quite possibly sociopathy or psychopathy) things about this creep? Aaaaaaand… go!

Certified Narc-Spotter

Even though I’m done with online dating, there is one small online dating site from which I haven’t bothered deleting my profile. Every once in a while I go back on to read messages that have been sent to me in order to practise my narc-spotting skills. After all, we know online dating sites are their favourite feeding ground so where better to hone our skills?

Today I went on after a long time and read the following message:

“So, how do I get you to say hi? Humor? Wit? Romance? gimme a hint, and I’ll do the rest”

Sure, DurhamChad. I’d be more than happy to train you upfront on how to best lovebomb me and pretend to be the man of my dreams.

But hey, maybe I’m being too hard on the guy. Let’s take a look at his profile to see if maybe he does a little better there:

“Never really know what to say here … Im a single dad with 3 amazing kids, I have joint custody 50/50.
Ask me whatever you wish I’m an open book… I’ll fill out more if I think of something funny n witty to throw in here :)”

Mr. Single Never Married has 3 amazing kids. Um, ok.

But isn’t it great that he’s an open book? It’s just too bad there are no words in his book because apparently in his quest for his future partner he can’t think of anything to say (conveniently leaving all his options open to move in whatever direction his unsuspecting prey should choose).

That’s a pretty familiar profile, wouldn’t you say? I remember my narc writing something similar in his last profile – not knowing what to say, wanting to say something funny, and coming back later to write more. Yeah right.

In the past, I gave guys the benefit of the doubt and a chance to explain their way out of little red flags that caught my eye. Not anymore.

To me, this dude is a perfect example of a narc fishing online. Buddy, you’re busted!

certified narc spotter

Video

First Kiss

This video gave me such a huge smile today. I lived vicariously through the pairs of strangers as they awkwardly looked at each other, nervously giggled, tentatively kissed and then passionately connected. It was so beautiful and touching.

That’s something to look forward to after a long and tumultuous relationship – that first kiss. So deliciously lovely. How lucky for me that I get to have at least one of those again in my future. 🙂